A Few Pieces of the Puzzle

So i stole this one from Miss Em over at Can You Point Me To The Bar ? Yes, technically its a meme that she didnt tag anyone for, but the idea was cute that i thought i'd " borrow " it.
Now the challenge was to peruse the funniness at http://www.someecards.com/ and find a few cards that depict a little bit of who you are and what you're about. Trust me, it may take you a while - you'll be checking out the pages for ages! But here's what i came up with:




Yes, i am kind of a movie snob. I watch all these fancy, foreign, arthouse films and i actually like them. I encourage my friends to watch them, raving about how good they are and you know what ? Most of my friends are so NOT critically acclaimed movie people - they're blockbuster people or, much to my chagrin, sometimes they're immature spoof movie people. Dont get me wrong, i love a bit of " Billy Madison " or action moves where a lot of stuff blows up, but i need a bit of intelliegence sometimes. Apologies about that.

Oh yea, i'm all about the naps. Cat naps, nanna naps, catch up naps, the litte naps you sneak in the back seat of the car on a long trip. Forget seeing Machu Pichu or eating lunch at a Buddhist monastery, i'm going to be in my last throwes and reminiscing about that lazy Sunday afternoon where i fell asleep on the lounge watching a re-run of M*A*S*H.

THis is for my friends. Pretty much, thats how i want to be thinking about you if i consider you as part of my inner circle. I'm super loyal, and you better be too. Like P, my best friend - she's totally invited to my funeral! I hope she makes cheesecake for everybody, in my memory of course....

Which is not to say i'm an unashamed horny biatch ( although we could be headed in that direction... ), just they i havent been getting out much. Its hard to meet people, to even have the opportunity for skanky one night shag, when you've been spending the majority of your weekend nights watching DVD's from the comfort of your loungeroom....


Aww, families, we all have one. I really like mine, as depicted above. Okay, maybe not all the wacky bastards - extended families can get seriously freaky! - but my immediate family ? I lubs them big lots. Thats us playing Trivial Pursuit by the way. My dad is cheating. Thats such a dad thing to do.

And thats it my lovelies. Go check out http://www.someecards.com/ if you need a Friday Feelgood and if you decide to follow in my footsteps and steal this blog idea, please let me know!

She knows what worship is.

So I was looking at the sheet that was filled out showing who got what in the praise band. My mom drew up the sheet since she was on the panel(and it was fair for her to be on there two other people who tried out had parents on the panel), and on my thing she put "understands worship". So that made me do a double take. I guess just hearing(seeing) it from someone else got me thinking. In ways I do understand worship, but in many I don't. Worship to me is connecting with God through something I'm doing or something that's happening to me. This year in Praise Band has really challenged me in the way I view worship. This year our worship leader really focused on the youth NOT worshiping and trying to fix that by telling them how and practically forceing them to. Well for those of you who are youth or have been one, you know that when someone tries to force you to do something a wall goes up right away and you aren't open to learning what that person is trying to teach you. I have seen that wall go up so many times in the youth from up on stage when she tries to get them to worship and I know she does too and it's tough to see. But I know now that worship cannot be forced or asked to come. It's all about where that person is in there walk with Christ and if that walk is even there. Mike our youth minister said to the band that out job is just to get up there and lead and make the music sound good so it's not distracting to anyone. That is a good standard for us. If we just focus on what the music is and worshiping for ourselves. So from in the crowd they can see that and follow because they see what we're doing and wonder why. Then they have that seed of worship planted in them and that interest grows for them and they devlop thier way of worshiping and not a way that someone says they should. Worship is not about the actual act of doing so. It's the heart of who is worshiping. If I as a worship leader got up there and told the youth that worship is all about raising your hands, I would be wrong. Because some would know that raising your hands is a way to worship, but for the rest who don't know that, would be confused them beacuse they wouldn't know that raising your hands can be a part of worship. But if we let go and let God control that then everything will fall into place. Everyone can worship as GOd wants them to.

Thanks for listening.

He's growing up!!!

Oh I'm so excited, proud, shocked, by my nephew Jacob. He asked Jesus into his heart this week!!!!! Apparently he and his mommy were talking about what Communion meant and Heidi said that it was a reminder of what Jesus did for us by dying on the cross. And Jacob got a real sad look on his face and said "I want Jesus in my heart."!!!!! I can't believe it he's only four. I'm so proud of him.
And when they went up to talk to the pastor of their church Jacob thought he was taking to long with the other person so Jacob went up and tapped him on the knees to get his attention. I think that's so cute. And then when the pastor started the sinners prayer Jacob couldn't really understand it so Jacob started praying. We said "Dear God I love you and I want in my heart and I'm sorry for all the bad things I've done. And I know You are the Only God" Well something like that. But Jacob is such a good example of having faith like a small child. He Believes in God with no doubts that older people get. I'm so proud of my nephew and pray for what God is going to do in his life, because now the possibilities that have been opened for him. I love you Jacob.
Talk Later.

People, Time and Place

Inishowen Peninsula

First come those dew-covered webs ground spiders make on the lawn. Then crickets start chirping as they are while I write - early on this misty morning. Ferns will begin to wither soon. Those are the signs of waning summer I notice each year. Others may detect different indications of the passing season, but those are the ones that bring me that familiar mixture of anticipation and dread when I realize that school will begin soon. It’s more anticipation than dread this year because I don’t know how many more first days there’ll for me. I’ve gone back in early September more than fifty times. When that pattern will end I don’t know, but it won’t be long.

As I sit here on my back porch, one of Ed Dunlea’s cows is lowing over on Shave Hill and a loon is crying on Kezar Lake. The mist is rolling back and forth between my hill and Ed’s like an ocean tide. When it’s over me I can’t see very far, but then it rolls the other way and I can see the mountainous horizon with a few patches of blue. I like it because there hasn’t been too much blue to look at up there lately. It’s warm and wet this day, but soon will come a morning crisp and dry. I’ll need long pants and a quilted shirt to sit out here so early, but that means the humidity will be gone too and I’ve had enough of that. The towel in my shower was clammy this morning and the salt shaker was caked up last night when I tried to sprinkle my corn.

It’s my habit to rise before the sun, when everything is still and I can watch the day dawn slowly while I go through my morning rituals. The dog knows I’m about, but no one else. The complicated world is simpler at this time. Early and alone is my favorite way to start the day. Then I’ll try to stay in it - stay in the moment if I can. I know my mind will drift away to the future or the past, but I hope I catch it and get back to the present before it gets lost. That’s not always easy for a history teacher. Today though, there’s much I must do to prepare for my journey to Ireland.

By the time this is published Thursday, I should be walking the streets of Dublin. When I tire of that, I’ll go north a bit to look over Newgrange, a five-thousand-year-old structure of white quartz and other stone. Little is known of the people who constructed it and carved its spiral patterns. Were any my ancestors? Don’t know. Nobody does. Then I’ll look over the Battle of the Boyne site nearby - that place where Catholics were defeated in 1690 and the Protestant British hardened their control over the island. Then I’ll head northwest to British-ruled Ulster where I want to feel what may remain of the struggle or “The Troubles” as they’re sometimes called. Many McLaughlins have lived in the city of Derry (or Londonderry as the British call it) for eight centuries, and still do. One, Mitchell McLaughlin, is General Secretary for Sinn Fein - political wing of the Irish Republican Army. He lives in Bogside, the Catholic quarter. Will it feel at all like my visit to the West Bank last year? I hope not, but we’ll see.

Then it’ll be on to Donegal further to the north - to the northernmost tip of Ireland (the Inishowen Peninsula) from where my great-grandfather, James McLaughlin, emigrated around 1900. It’s part of the Republic of Ireland and most people are surprised to hear that. “Northern Ireland” conjures up British-occupied Ireland, but it would more accurately be called “Northeast Ireland.” I want to find what remains of his house and get a feel for the people still there. After more than a century, will I recognize any by their looks or their laughter or by something else? We’ll see. I’ll keep my movie camera handy to record it if I do.

During the few August days I spend in that remote place, I’ll smell it, see it, hear it, and feel it - find out why my great-grandfather left it, and maybe get some clues about myself.

Hump Day Wednesday

I have a really good day. Nothing special happened, but it was just one of those days where a succession of little things make you smile and then, before you know it, your smiling all on your own and just enjoying the day. It probably helped that its Hump Day Wednesday and not a Monday, but still.... So what got me smiling ?

* My hair looked really cute today. I usually straighten it and either leave it out or then throw it up into a ponytail, but today i had one peice of hair that just didnt want to go straight. So what did i do ? INsetad of wrestling with it, i just kicked the rest out at the ends aswell, so i had this cute little flippy thing going on.

* I listened to Panic at The Disco's new album " Pretty. Odd " on the way to work. I am loving this album right now. Its just quirky, hippy, slightly pyschodelic, sunshiney pop.... perfect start to the morning.

* A lady with a baby came in to have her eyes tested. The baby was probably only a couple of months old and he had a sweet shock of chicken-y fluff hair right on the crowd of his head. He smiled at me. Too cute!

*Both of my co-workers were in a good mood today, as compared to yesterday. It always makes things more fun if everybody has a good vibe going on.

* I was really productive at work today. I spent a long time staring at numbers and entering data, but we're caught up from having had Monday off work.

*I finished right on time - the clock tower bell chimed 5 o'clock and i was out of there, no having to wait back for straggling patients!

It was just one of those days we're all the good little things mount up until your floating along on a cloud of contentment. And you know how once you started " floating along " you start to seem floating in and out to ? At least i do. What i mean is once i'm having a really good day i start drifting off into daydreams, usually drifting right down Memory Lane, to other good times and events : hanging out on lunch breaks with friends at school; coming up out of Penn Station onto the streets of New York City for the first time; a lazy afternoon spent with a cute guy leading to the best sex ever; seeing John Butler Trio play in New York City and learning that all the Americans knew the words to " Zebra "; hanging out with my gorgeous neice and having her spontaneously say " I love you Aunty Amy " .... you know, all the good stuff. The stuff that sustain a person when they arent having such a great day.

So there you be. Hope you all had, or having a great day too. If not check out this here musical video and let Panic at the Disco make it all better .......

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3f3K2sEHuIM

Wholeheartedly, I'm Grateful....

So i have had another productive day - cancelled my telephone service, cancelled my gas service, redirected my mail - in regards to moving house. And i know packing up your crap into boxes and running errands isnt exactly exciting but being productive, achieveing even on a small scale, puts a smile on my face. You know what else puts a smile on my face ? Testimonials like this :

Amy, you are a precious jewel, sparkling brightly out of a box of paste blogs. You are the real deal. Genuine and true. You craft words with an artist's eye. Your talent for writing is a gift you use with such natural ease, that you ought to make it your vocation in life. You are a sweet and beautiful person, generous with your compliments and encouragement, you know how to make people smile. Determined and strong, you lead by example, and have wisdom beyond your youthful years. You are inspirational.....and you're a hot chic with a wicked sense of humour!

In case you were wondering, that was written by the wonderful Steph on her insightful and very entertaining blog " The Panic Room " . This was in response to a meme i challenged her to which required her to say something nice about the person who sent the challenge ( namely, well, me ).

And, now,my turn to say thank you. Sincerely. A huge thank you to you Steph because i think you understand better than most of my readers just how much kind words can mean. I read those words whilst having a lunch break from packing, and it seriously almost brought tears to my eyes. Those few sentences are almost the most beautiful compliment that anyone has ever paid me and the fact that it came from someone i know only through this wonderful invention called the "internet" means a lot. It means that something of me, something of who I am and who i am trying to be, is shining through in my words.

Thats my whole aim here - to share who I really am. I know that sounds all mushy and frankly, kind of fake, but its the truth - there are things i confess to here that i dont tell anyone in my real life, usually for fear of ridicule or just that peculiar funny look people give you when they know you're innermost secrets. Isnt it funny that I, that we as a collective of bloggers, dont mind giving of our secret selves to a handful ( or few million.... ) of strangers, yet some of us cant even fathom cluing our nearest and dearest into the sordid details ? But its oddly comforting to me that some random person in some random place can know my thoughts, that things can be off my chest and floating around in cyber space instead of clogging me up, instead of giving me emotional constipation ( as opposed to verbal diarrhea, which is what i usually have ).

So thank you - yes, YOU - anybody and everybody who is reading this, no matter who or where you are, for sharing and for taking on board all my emotional, pyschological and sometimes egotisitical ramblings. Muchos gracias, muchos.....

Oddly Comfortable Deja Vu

So i have spent the majority of the day moving loads of stuff to my parents house. I'm not actually officially moving out of my duplex until next weekend but i thought i'd get a jump on proceedings. I've basically moved all my stuff from my room here to my room there - clothes, shoes, accessories, toiletries and beauty products. I've kept enough stuff here to last me the next five days but other than that its all set up at Ma and Pa's. I have to admit that cleaning out the wardrobe has been like a cleansing ( goodbye old stuff, hello more room in wardrobe for new stuff! ) and the packing, unpacking and moving back and forth has been almost as good a workout as going to the gym.

But you know what ? I have this odd split feeling. Everything feels so familiar - i've put my bed in the same position as it was when i was a teenager, my clothes are all on the same shelves, things like that - but its all so weird too. I'm conflicted - i dont know whether i'm okay with moving back or not, and i dont know whether i should feel grateful that my parents are looking out for me, or irritated that my sister had to move out. Thats quite selfish actually, isnt it? Of COURSE i should be grateful. If it werent for their generous offer i'd probably soon be wallowing in debt. And its not exactly my sisters fault that she lost her job ( the place where she worked closed down ) but she isnt exactly trying enormously hard to look for more fulltime work, so i'm kind of peeved.

On the other hand, it might be nice to have actual conversations with people again. I dont know whether i mentioned it before but the few months my sister and i lived together we rarely had actual discussions - sure, we talked, we jibber-jabbered, but rarely did we sit down and actually talk. So it will be nice to able to, say, watch a news report and then be able to discuss the issue with my parents ( my father in particular ). Plus, it'll be good to save that little bit of extra money. That'll come in real handy when i make the move to Sydney, with its high cost of living and all.

So just think - this time next week i'll be blogging from the comfort of my old bedroom, hanging out on my bed with my cd player blaring, just the way i did when i was 15 yrs old. Only, back then, it was a paper and pen diary and i didnt have an audience....