Polly Dolly - She's Got Legs...In Tights

Ah, i'm so happy the wonderful Dani from Danimezza got the Polly Dolly challenge out on time this weeek - i dont know how i would have suffered through last weeks withdrawals all over again! This week Dani has been lucky enough to have been attending Loreal Melbourne Fashion Festival and, inspired by the catwalks, wants to know how our Polly would wear...

She's Got Legs ... In Tights by Amy1984 featuring wrapped jewelry

Now, allow me a disclaimer here - I am not the biggest fan of tights. I have previously declared war on jeggings, which are the ban of my existence. However, seeing as I am not my Polly Dolly - she is far taller, thinner and more glamorous than me! - i have ignored that the fact that usually i would trumpet " Tights are not pants! ". Also - tunics are long enough to cover my Pollys bum, and thats my main thing against girls in tights ( i dont wana see your bottom ladies! ). With that said...

I found this cute H&M tunic, which is more like an over-sized shirt than it is the more kaftan-style tunics. I really got a cute, aristocratic, polo-set type feel from it .... it felt like something Kate Middleton or Zara Phillips would wear. I paired it with grey tights and some great, brown leather accessories( including a wider belt ), a soft knit slouch beanie/beret and some easy neutral make-up to keep the look classic and polished. Now all thats left for Polly to decide is - lunch with the ladies or off to the polo?

A Campaign Of Great Importance

Once in a blue moon there comes a campaign that, if enough people jump onboard, can change the world. This is one such campaign. This is an issue close to my heart, and i would appreciate if all my loyal followers would band with me and together we can....

Yes, thats right, together we can BAN JEGGINGS FOREVER! I care so much about this very important issue that i have even taken the time to create my very own campaign badge ( i dont know how to do the code so feel free to copy and paste that baby to your page ). Jeggings are a scourge on society and, united, we can rid ourselves of them.

Granted, the jeggings in those there photographs dont look too bad. However, bare in mind that those are professional models who are built like praying mantises and if it werent for this fact the jeggings would be horrid on them too. I do not understand the appeal of the jegging - we all know how much i hate leggings of the ordinary variety, but at least they are what they are. Jeggings are leggings dressed up as jeans - so if you want to wear tights ( that are so clearly NOT pants ) then choose leggings; if you want to wear jeans then choose yourself a nice pair of skinnies. Do not choose a hybrid ( hybrid cars on the other hand are ok by me ). It was enough seeing young women ( and more than a handful of old birds who should know better ) getting around in leggings, worn as pants, with all their imperfections and visible pantylines ( if we're lucky ) on show for all the world to see. Now i have to put up with jeggings, with their faux-denim look and painted on pockets? Ridiculous! Skinnies maybe form-fitting but at least they are a little more forgiving than jeggings.

So, people of the world unite! Pander to the jeggings market no more, and implore your pretty young friends to buy themselves a good pair of proper pants! Wear your gorgeous knee high boots over skinny jeans, and not over fake Spandex jean knock offs! And men out there, stop ogling teenage girls who run around town in their jeggings and Ugg boots - they are far too young and you are not helping the cause. If we work at it, together we can rid the planet of jeggings, and save our retinas from further damage.

BAN JEGGINGS FOREVER!!

The 7 Things I Hate About Lady Gaga

Alright, yes - so i paraphrased the title of a Miley Cyrus song. But Miley Cyrus for all her tweensy cuteness and fake drama is sooooo much more tolerable ( to me ) than stupid Lady Gaga. Sometimes you dislike a singer or a band or an actor and you dont really know why - you just cant put your finger on it. Yea - well i can. Here, in a rough order, are the 7 reasons why i really just dont like the artist known as " Lady Gaga ":

7. She thinks her persona and her music are completely original. Innovative. Unable to be put into any one genre. Bah! The controversial outifts and styling ? This lady named Madonna - i dont know, you might have heard of her - did all that first. And as for the music .... lets just say the first time i heard " Papparazzi " on teh radio i thought it was Gwen Stefani. And now that i've said that, you can al totally picture Gwen ( or Katy Perry, or a desperate Kylie Minogue ) singing any one of Lady's songs.
6. She calls herself " Lady Gaga ". We all know she has a real name, and sure there are plenty of other famous people with stage names - but who is so pretentious as to name themselves " Lady " anything ? It could denote aristocracy or it could allude to her feminine manners .... although i dont think someone who constantly appears in public wearing only a leotard has a claim to either of those. In fact, i like to refer to her as Lady Gag - as in thats what she makes me do. Gag.
5. She carries a tea cup. And why does she carry the tea cup ? Is it to carry on the pretention mentioned in the previous bullet point ? No - apparently she did it to make the tea cup famous and thus prove the ridiculousness of fame. All it proved to me is that Lady Gaga herself s ridiculous. And lame.
4. Also, she refers to her tea cup as a " she ". Its bad enough that she carried one around, but she also refers to an inanimate object as a particular gender. I wonder if it has a name, and whether she's afraid of revealing it in case the tea cup becomes more famous than her. What would its name be - Lady Bone China ?
3. She went through a phase of having " cupids bow " lips painted on. Listen, your not Louise Brooks. And your not a Japanese geisha ( although i'm sure i've just given her an idea for her next video clip ). So i just want to tell you getting around in that stupid hat with her stupid painted on lips and carrying your stupid tea cup is.... Stupid.
2. The line " I wanna take a ride on your disco stick ". Seriously ? I dont think i really need to elaborate on this one.

And the number one thing i hate about Lady Gaga ?
1. She doesnt wear pants. We all know how i feel about leggings as pants. But Ms Gaga doesnt even bother with the leggings - its no pants day, every day, at Gaga's house. She constantly photographed in either a leotard or a bustier.... and shoes. Carrying a tea cup. But wearing no pants. Therefore, i cannot even contemplate seeing eye to eye with her.

People who insist on pants-less-ness are my enemies.....

*NOTE* I refuse to post a picture of the pants-less-ness. No. Freaking. Way.

Do My Eyes Deceive Me ?

A young bald man walked past the front window of my work today swathed in maroon clothe... i couldnt figure out if he was a monk or if he was just wearing a Snuggy.

Hey, it was cold, a Snuggy would have been a good idea.

Also, i saw a woman walking around the mall my shop is in wearing a surgerical mask. Swine flu hysteria anyone? I'd sign up for a ticket on the swine flu express if it meant i could produce my own bacon. It doesnt though, does it ?

Lastly, i am so tired of seeing young girls wearing opaque tights... as pants. I know i've ranted about this one before but TIGHTS ARE TIGHTS. THEY ARE NOT PANTS. Pants are pants. Pants require fabric, preferably that isnt see through. And a winter day which is also teeming with rain requires pants. Get the memo young ladies - do not make me call your mothers!

This is all. Also, i'm tired, so i could have hallucinated some, or all, of that. You decide.